I thought it was time to complete some thoughts on my advice to fellow Aspies.

 This tip I have is to take care of your bodies. You only get one of these in your life (most times). It is so important that we take care of them so we can live to our fullest potential.

Just a side note: I am NOT a doctor by any means a lot of what I’ve learned has been due to watching a lot of Dr. Oz, and the like. Always talk to your doctor and do research before applying any of these tips!’

I want to see you ALL live lives happy and healthy! Ready for my tips?

• Know your food allergies. A lot of Aspies are actually allergic to some degree to dairy, and gluten. Allergies can have many manifestations. Research them and pay attention how you react to new foods and spices. I personally developed an allergy to fish later in my life (I discovered it at 17 or 18), so they can pop up even after you first try them. The good thing is that here are therapies (holistic and traditional) that can help, and sometimes even reverse the allergy entirely.
• Eat a balanced diet. You’ve probably heard this a million times from people but it really IS important. I personally have cut out red meat in my diet and stick to whole wheat pastas, and breads whenever I have the choice. I also stay away from processed foods as much as I can, and eat my veggies. I also rarely add salt to anything I cook or eat. I use spices or sometimes low fat cheese to bring out flavor. When thinking about food don’t just go by the calorie content, research what nutrients it has in it and how to preserve them (like by not over cooking your veggies, leaving the peel on your apple, ect.) This is especially important if we need to lose weight, get our blood pressure down (and keep it down) or keep our cholesterol levels in check.
• Be active. Also, something you’ve probably heard a million times. Exercise is a great stress reliever. Thanks Oxytocin! So instead of stress eating or vegging in front of a TV, take a walk, take a hike with friends, play a sport, go for a run with your dog, or take a swim. For those of you who don’t feel comfortable going out of the house, there are several work out games, (“Dance, Dance Revolution” is a good one I’ve used). Just move, and find something you enjoy. :) If you’re like me and need to lose some weight (or just want to), talk to you doctor and figure out the best steps for you to take. What helps me is amping my workout up when it starts to feel too easy. As for me I love swimming, the treadmill at a high incline (15%), the stepper machines, free weights, weight machines, and floor exercises. I’ve lost 30 pounds doing what I have, so it does work!

• Find things that relax your mind. The body is very much connected to the mind. It’s essential to relax our minds and mind our stress levels for our bodies to work like they should. I’m a Christian so I like to pray and listen to music that encourages a stable state of mind if I’m stressed. Meditation and being thankful for what you DO have in your life can make your stresses seem less. So can talking to someone you trust. I know talking and trusting someone is hard for us, but worth it when we find someone worthy.

PS: I am NOT a doctor by any means a lot of what I’ve learned has been due to watching a lot of Dr. Oz, and the like. Always talk to your doctor and do research before applying any of these tips!

I’m going to write some relationship blogs soon. What do you guys want to have me write about? Let me know! Your comments and questions are welcome always!

“How did I do it?” I often wonder to myself. How did I go from not being able to hug someone who loves hugs? How did I learn that you had to care more about other people’s interests to get friends? Well, I have a few to thank for that. My Mom with her prayers and guidance, always made a conscious effort to teach me about what to do, and not to do. She prayed for me, and encouraged others who knew what I faced to also. My main problem was I could repeat all her advice, but I had trouble actually putting it into practice.

Another person who helped me was my boyfriend back in high school, who in a trial by fire kind of way brought my flaws out, and corrected me in some oddities. Oddities being bringing up random subjects out of nowhere, or just saying silly things, or having silly fears. He also taught me that I was not soo odd as to never be able to attract a good guy. He told me a lot he thought I would make a good mother(which was news to me since I was and am a bit uncomfortable around kids-I want to be good with them though), and his friends said I made him happier than he had been in years. Why did we break up you may wonder? Well, because our spiritual differences were far too great. More on that later.

Friends and church leaders along the way have also helped me, though I had to learn the hard way a lot of times. For instance, people don’t like it when you obsessively talk about “Lord of the Rings” (or any other thing). I remember one of the nicest girls in the youth group saying about me once “oh, she’ll talk your ear off!”. Now, for me to annoy her was a feat.

Not being content in just going to church, and having my family was a bit scary for me, ok, quite scary. I actually had to venture out, and find people with like minds or at least interests, and earn their trust. Another obstacle to me finding friends, especially in the church, was my dogmatic way of viewing Christianity. I thought I was right all of the time, and didn’t care what others thought, well, I did, I just wanted them to agree with me. I would gladly end a potential friendship because in my opinion they weren’t worthy of being my friend. My standards, in other words, were just TOO high.

God, he’s the one who really helped me in this area. He highlighted that sin in people’s lives was just the symptom of pain and in some cases, ignorance. I wasn’t to judge the girl who slept around, or someone who was addicted to drugs. Applying that was easier to do with the girl who slept around, than the person who used drugs or who just had a bad attitude. I had pity for these people but I was more concerned with maintaining what I thought was my own decency. I discovered that my pride and judgements were just as bad as theirs. It was just a different sin, and a religious spirit tried to overcome me. You can tell a religious spirit by it’s tendency to tear others and even yourself down in the guise of “holiness”. It leaves one feeling condemned rather than empowered to walk out being holy before God.

 This is something I see in the Aspie community, the tendency to be dogmatic and stiff, or just so distracted by our own interests that we don’t pay His calls of love much attention. No matter what anything has told you dear one, you are so loved by God. He is real, and wanting to be a part of everything in your life. He is the giver of all good things. You are worth more than GOLD to Him. He’s more obsessed with you than you could ever be with a person or subject, and he knows just what reaches you. He can and will help you become like Him. This life should not be about becoming more NT, or a better Aspie, it should be about being in love with God, and letting his love change us into something looking like Him. It’s the only reason why today I can hug people without hesitation have the courage to just live my life with purpose.

“And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” 2 Corinthians 3:18.

 I pray this blog reaches someone. If you have any comments or questions, please share them.

Hey My Aspie Family!

 You may of read some of my blogs so far, and maybe you haven’t. I just felt moved to give you guys a bit of advice in the area of self-image and how you present yourself to the world.

 In my experience a lot of Aspie’s don’t place a lot of thought and care into how we look and present ourselves. I know, I am one, and was there. I had to be reminded by my mother to wash my hair and reminded to put on my pants the right way. The nickname “twisted sister” came up from that. I hated it but until I learned, I came off very awkward. About the time I lost a lot of weight when I was 18 I began being more self-conscious of my own looks. I had gone from a size 16 to a size 8 or 6 (American sizes- forgive me). It was through exercise every day and different eating habits but I now realize while the food I ate was lean, probably didn’t have the most nutritional benefit in the world. I then started to look at clothes and makeup as beneficial.

 I’m going to go over dress for this first blog on self-image. Dressing your body should be a way you can express yourself and present yourself as a person demanding respect from other people. Dressing sloppy in an old t-shirt and ratty jeans for an interview obviously wouldn’t be sending off a signal saying “hire me”. We don’t place a lot of value on style or presentation sometimes, but the world we live in does. Remember that standards of beauty are largely culturally and socially constructed. Just because you don’t fit in to what your society says is beautiful in body type, height, hair color, hair density, or whatever doesn’t mean you’re not beautiful.

 I’ll put some bullet points here for you to remember.

• Always take good care of your hair, girls, please brush it, and wash it regularly. Guys, do the same, and don’t be afraid to try different styles if you want. I’m not against dyed hair, but bright colors still aren’t really accepted in the workplace, unless you work in a place that likes the alternative styles.
• Dress as well as you can for a given situation. This may take research on your part, and do what you can with what you have. Guys, wear your pants where they belong, not down around your butt, and not SO high you look like Steve Urkel. If you’re unsure of whether the pants you have fit you, as someone, like a family member, or honest friend. The good thing about Aspies is that we take advice well when we’re looking for it. Girls, respect yourselves, and don’t present yourself like you’re worth nothing. Racy attire is just as damaging to you as weary dowdy clothes for no reason. Think to yourself “Does this outfit portray myself in a way that would inspire people to respect me, or take advantage of me?” 
• Love yourself. This is the most important advice I can give because once you learn to love yourself, you love others a lot more. You will shine a confidence and inner beauty that will make others take notice.